THE SPARROW

Resilient and swift with winged endurance undaunted by raging storms, remarkably agile, vigorous and strong. Yet fragile if snared and too tightly grasped, For then, crushed  and broken lies her body, her spirit, and her song - M.H.         

Sparrows seem impervious to severe winds or inclement weather. They fly continually, all day long, foraging for food. They have been clocked at great speeds and have been known to fly hundreds of miles in one day. Their energy levels are enormous and even their wing revolutions per minute present an awesome number. Sparrows are incredibly strong and tough little birds, making them appear virtually indestructible. However, as powerful as sparrows are, if you were to catch a sparrow in your hand and squeeze it, you could break every bone in its body and crush it to death within thirty seconds.

People are like sparrows, they can be held, but not too tightly, or their heart and spirit will be crushed and their song will be lost.

There are many ways a person can be held. They can be held in contempt or in esteem. They can be gripped by fear or lifted higher. The life can be squeezed out of them by a strangle hold, or they can be gently hugged and cherished. They can receive a helping hand, or held down. Everyone will have opportunity to hold a precious life in their hands at some point, when that time comes what will you do with it?

What comes out of your mouth reflects what’s in your heart.  Matthew 12:34(b)

Proverbs 4:23/Matthew 12:34(b)

“Death and life are in the power of the tongue” (Proverbs 18:21).

There is great power in the words you use. Even the ones you speak in your own head.We’ve all heard the statement “sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.” I think many of us wish it were this easy. But Words hold power. They create meaning from situations, label circumstances, provide safety in a relationship, or can destroy a relationship. Words are given their power by the way in which they are used and we are the only ones that can control what words we choose to use, (Ephesians 4:15), speak the truth in love.
 

But, it can be really challenging to be constantly aware of our words. Sometimes we wonder if it is worth it. We get frustrated that we are asked to be sensitive or expected to be politically correct. We are drawn to what we perceive as truth about people or circumstances and are eager to right what we believe to be wrong.

I meet with a lot of hurting people on a weekly basis. Many of which who have life-long scars from someone who has used words carelessly. Almost always, the people who have caused the most damage with their words remain unaware of the wounds they caused or are causing. Most of us do not want to intentionally cause harm to someone with our words. So how do we prevent this?

I tell my clients to think of themselves as a mirror when they are talking with or about someone else. When you look in a mirror you see a visual image of yourself. When we hear others words we derive meaning from those words and our mental mirror becomes distorted. What image is the person you are speaking to see through your words?

This is easiest to see in a parent/child dynamic. When a toddler looks up wide-eyed to his screaming parent, he begins framing meanings about himself through his parent’s words. He begins to believe he’s a failure, he’s annoying, bothersome, or worthless. He views himself through these words and the words become his identity that he may carry for a lifetime. This is true even with adults. And the closer the relationship you have, the more influence you have over their identity and self-worth.

Research tells us that it takes five positive statements to counteract every negative statement we make to an individual. This is true even when our “negative” statement is done in a productive, caring, and loving way. Imagine the damage we do when those criticisms and contempt eek out!

Use your words wisely. Speak life into a broken individual. Speak life into your home: your spouse, your children, or your parents! Speak life into your community: your irritable boss, the inattentive waitress, the individual who was just shamed for his differences.

Words can heal, and words can destroy. It’s not easy, but we can better our world by being aware of our words (Ephesians 4:32).

 ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did to one of the least of these you did to me' - Matthew 25:40 (JESUS)

ABIDING

May your eyes be opened to the wonderful. (Isaiah 9:6/John 15:1-8, NIV)

I will not die an unlived life. I will not live in fear of falling or catching fire. I choose to inhabit my days, to allow my living to open me,  to make me less afraid, more accessible, to loosen my heart until it becomes a wing, a torch, a promise. I choose to risk my significance;   to live so that which came to me as seed goes to the next as blossom and that which came to me as blossom, goes on as fruit. ~ Dawna Markov